from Thirteen to Eternity
Say "Hello" to little 13 year old me. Besides a few acne problems she looks like she has it all together doesn't she? That's exactly what I wanted everyone to think of me. I was a straight A student who cried if she got anything below a 93%, I was a personal therapist to my friends, I was known for always smiling, and I was an all-around people-pleaser. I defined myself by those things and I was in constant fear of falling short of the expectations that myself and others had set for me. Most of this fear came from my "best friend" of 11 years who was mentally and physically abusive. This friend of mine had gained so much control in my life by the time I had turned 12 that I had no idea what I actually liked and disliked. Most of the time I was just confused and I felt lost; however, I was too afraid to find out my actual likes and dislikes because that could have displeased my friend. It was also around this time that most of my self-worth came from w...